After Ours - then and now

For those of you who didn't know, After Ours had a little op. on her tummy yesterday (Sunday) and is currently recovering in room 1161 of Songkhla Nakarin (Mor Or) Hospital in Hatyai.  She's likely to be there for at least a week, so drop in and see her if you're on the way to Tesco; or why not make a special journey? 

Get well soon Nian!

Awwww . . .

OK, enough KY already. What could be cuter than small children learning how to serve ice cold beer?

The secrets of photographic perfection

The Online Scum is gratified by the surge of interest in photography evidenced in recent posts here. In our effort to further serve the hashing community we have therefore asked the eminent photographer Henri Cartier-Beaver for his tips on taking the perfect photograph. Here, after some copy editing (he seems to have problems with certain letters of the alphabet), is his response.

There are three basic requirements to a good photograph: the right subject, the right light, and right moment.

Your subject of course is the key to your photograph. It might be something of singular beauty, or joy or pathos, or deep mystery. It might be something from ordinary life, but seen in an extraordinary way. Find a great subject and you are halfway to a great photograph.

Next, light. "Photography" of course means to write with light, and without good light there are no good photographs. Cameras see differently than the human eye, and much of a photographer's education has to do with learning to recognize good photographic light. The recent photos here posted by my esteemed colleague Mr. Egghead are textbook examples of, shall we say, less than optimal photographic light. Show me a superb photograph and odds are that the photographer had (or created) superb light.

Finally, the moment. It can be a gesture, a glance, a ray of sunlight breaking out of a cloud -- anything that makes one instant stand out from all the others, and makes it worthy of being frozen in time. You might even call it, er, the decisive moment.  

So there you have it: subject, light, and moment. Put them together and, voila, the perfect photograph.

Our hares this weekend

This weekend, SH3 and HH3 are privileged to have as hares, two of our most illustrious and celebrated loonies psychopaths social deviants members, "Burn'em down" Buk Toy and Sex Sprinter, the man for whom the term cakehole takes on a new and special meaning which encompasses the whole of his head!

Details are:

Songkhla Hash House Harriers run #1623. Saturday July 7th 2012: 4:30 p.m.

Hares: Buk Toy and Sex Sprinter

Misdirections: From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for about 9k to the run site on the right near the quarry.

Sunday's (July 8th, 2012: 4:30 p.m.) so far unmapped HH3 run will take place in front of the Sai Kao Resort: From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for 4.7k. Turn left for 6k then left for about 4.5k to the run site on the left. The hares are Toy Boy and Sex Printer who wish to remain anonymous!

Full moon 88: Symmetry in motion

It was back to business as usual for HFMH3 last night - on a weekday night and without the free beer that has swollen the numbers on the last two runs to unprecedented heights. But even without such stalwarts as Sofar and Ouab Im, Yardo, Softy and Temp, the Wursts, and Scud, about 20 people pitched up and enjoyed the fragrantly located run site as well as a geometrically designed run, which stretched the limits of "about 6k" to a bit over 7k. But even with a fair number of F's and 360's, it still took only an hour 10 with the leaders and laggards separated by about a minute. 

Back at the runsite, vast amounts of food and modest (by recent standards) amounts of beer were consumed, and the breeze was shot, with subjects ranging from current structural weaknesses in the international financial system through the discovery of the Higgs Boson and  quantum information theory, to whether the athletic looking people apparently joining SH3 this week (see below) are of the female persuasion or are actually Katoeys! The geezers, meanwhile, dribbled into their beer cans and burbled inanely about how things aren't what they used to be and how they don't make movies like Casablanca anymore. G.O.D. ain't what it used to be!

Hashers by sunset.

And here's yet another fake, culled from HH3's annoyingly up-to-date and regularly used Facebook page. Whoever it is who's done the  Create-a-Masterpiece-Using-Photoshop course, I wish they'd stop trying to fool us that these are genuine snaps taken with a common or garden digital jobbie.
Henri Cartier Volestrangler comments: Of curse zis illustrates completly der point zat Cartier Beaver was meking. Ze light frem ze zun has absolootely rendered ze people in ze forground unrecognizable as uman beings, in fact wun ov zem looks a leetle lak a dog!

New runner alert

A respected senior member of The Cronies™ (but I’m being redundant) has suggested that the photos in the post below of last weekend’s runs don’t do much for our effort to attract new hashers. Specifically he seems to find that Tutti Frutti looks like a geezer, while KY appears to have come from a different planet.

To which we say . . . well, what do you expect? Look at the material we’ve got to work with. But hold the presses! This email just in!

“Hi Scum,

My name is Monica. That’s me in the middle, along with my friends Barbi and Jasmine. We read The Online Scum constantly and we think you’re great! The only thing we like more than running is drinking beer and then giving backrubs to nice older guys, so we can’t wait to come run with your hash! You wouldn’t mind having us, would you?

Yours truly,

Monica, Barbi, and Jasmine

P.S. Jasmine has an M.A. in law enforcement and has a real thing for guys with guns. Do any of you fellows pack heat?”

So . . . apparently things are looking up for SH3! We don’t know when the girls will be coming, but you certainly don’t want to miss it. So be sure to come every single week! On-on!

Impossible!

It's amazing what you can do with Photoshop isn't it? These pictures are clearly fakes and yet if you didn't know better you would swear that they are pictures of beautiful sunsets over Hatyai taken at recent HH3 runs. But we all know that such pictures are completely impossible since there just isn't enough light to take photographs of sunsets without using such a big F stop that you lose all the detail etc. etc.
Who'd be a photographer huh?

Geezer pride + pussy prejudice

 

Tutti Frutti monopolizes the womenfolk.

With our GM and one or two others off at work, it was a small turnout on Saturday and a modest little run. Which, considering that the hare was Lat Duang, made for a pleasant change of pace. Fine quality running too, with a particularly nice gentle winding downhill trail from the top. 

Rock and Roll (or is it Hip Hop?) uses the German Beer Can Holder for her pre-run stretching.

Not that we really keep track or anything, but first back in exactly 50 minutes were Beaver and Egghead, coming in from slightly different directions but both on paper (admittedly, in the the case of the former, perhaps not entirely the correct paper), followed a pace or two behind by Sex Sprinter, who of course could have blown both of them away if he had wanted. Fortunately not everyone on this hash is shamelessly competitive. Just, it seems, the geezers. 

Sexy Girl and Sex Star return from setting the "short" run. 

 Sunday’s hash was a whole different kettle of fish. But then we expected that, given that the run was on the backside of Hatyai’s toughest hill and the hares were or at least included Sex Star, Sex Ao Ao, and Sexy Girl. These are the true serial offenders of your classic blood-and-guts Hatyai Hash run.

I'm sorry, I can't help myself. The guy is just ridiculously photogenic.

And don’t think that because Sexy Girl is, uh, a girl, she is any less brutal than her fanatic 0%-body-fat husband or the totally mutant Fuckrat. She’s the one famous for setting short runs longer than the long run, and judging by the amount of square paper I saw up there at the higher elevations, she didn’t exactly hold back this time either. As for the long run . . . let’s just say, seriously epic.  

Pigs!

Wednesday 4th July will be US Independence Day and to celebrate this joyous occasion, this month's full moon run will take place that day, next to the pig farm off the New Yala Road. Full details are:

Hatyai Full Moon Hash House Harriers run #88, Wednesday  July 4th, 2012, 7:00 p.m.
Hare: Kai Jeow
Misdirections: From the Ko Yo intersection, take the New Yala road for about 7.5k and turn right at the top of the hill onto the wide dirt road, to the run site about 100 meters down on the left.

The usual stuff applies: Bring some food, and beer if you can't handle the Full Moon special brew which will be on sale at 3 cans for 100 Baht. And don't forget to bring a handlight if you intend to join either the short or the long run.