Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Runs and regies

First up, this month’s full moon run takes place Thursday, 1st October and is being set by Lady of the Lamp, a.k.a. Stick Insect. Directions appear below but if you don't like scrolling down, are:
From the Ko Yo Intersection go 0.9k towards Songkhla Hospital and turn left at the orange flashing light just before the hospital then go 1k. The run site is 20m in.





Tomorrow night's hare
(the one without the pink T shirt)



Usual stuff applies:Run starts 7:00 p.m.’ish; bring a hand light and some beer although Full Moon Hash special brew will be on sale at 4 cans for 100Baht. Contributions of food always welcome.

Saturday’s SH3 run is a live hare affair.
Details are: Run #1477, Saturday October 3rd, 4:30 p.m.
Hares: Egghead (long and live) and Only a Yolk (short and vacillating)









Misdirections: From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for 4.7k and turn left for 6k, then left for 4k to the run site on the right.

Hatyai H3’s run on Sunday (4th October, 4:00 p.m. or when you can get there) is from just past Wat Keow Kloy From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for 4.7k and turn left for 8k then go straight ahead at the wat and look for a sign).
The hare is Sexy Pig.








Finally, don’t forget that Saturday and Sunday are early-bird registration days for the SH3 birthday run ‘Night of the Living Dead’ on 31st October. All named SH3 and HH3 runners at the run site can register for 100 Baht (adults and kids alike). After this week it will be 150 Baht for named active runners and 300 Baht for guests and returning runners.
On! On!

Fool Moon Ruin

The howling, growling, towelling Hash.
Farce dat 1st. October, 2009.
Medium run by Stick Insect, Short run by accident (if it rains hard mayonly be short run)
From Koh Yoh Intersection go towards the Hospital 0.9 kms. turn left (at orange flashing light)
Go 1 km. Runsite about 20 metres in on left.
Bring candles and food and ....beer.
On-On S.I.

Monday, September 28, 2009

"Alcohol as a Lifesaver in Head Injuries"

We may have to rethink our whole first-run-then-drink sequence. Turns out that if you're going to seriously injure your head (attention: Stick Insect), the best possible thing is to get drunk first. Here's the story, courtesy of the New York Times:

Head-injury patients are less likely to die if they have drunk alcohol, though they experience more complications, a study suggests.
The researchers used a national trauma database to review the cases of 38,019 patients with moderate to severe traumatic brain injuries who had been tested for alcohol when brought to the hospital in 2000-5. For every 100 patients with severe brain injuries who tested negative for alcohol and died, only 88 patients with alcohol in their bloodstream died, a statistically significant 12 percent difference, according to the study, which appears in the Sept. 21 issue of Archives of Surgery.
If the findings are supported by future studies, they may lead to efforts to determine whether “there is a role for giving people a small amount of alcohol after they get injured,” said the paper’s first author, Dr. Ali Salim, an associate professor of surgery at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles.
He added: “We are not trying to say the alcohol is good, so go out and drink when you drive. That’s the last message we want to put out there.”

Friday, September 25, 2009

Night of the Living Dead Part II

Runs 'n' stuff this week

This week’s double birthday celebration run details are:

Run #1476, Saturday September 26th, 4:30 p.m.

Hares: Only a Yolk, Meals on Wheels and Egghead

Misdirections: From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for 4k and turn left then follow the road for about 8k and turn right. Follow the bendy road for 2k then turn right at the hash sign and follow the road heading towards Khao Ron for about 1k to the runsite on the right.

(From Hatyai, turn right at the Nam Noi traffic lights and follow the road for about 11k, then turn left into the Khao Ron Road and follow it for about 2k to the run site on the right)

Sunday’s HH3 run (September 27th, 4:00 p.m.) is a joint run with Union Hash; hares unknown. The run site can be reached from Thanon Poonakan: From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for 4.7k and turn left then follow the road for about 8k and turn right into Poonakan at Wat Keow Kloy. Go about 8k down Poonakan and turn right at the hash sign. Follow the road for about 3k to the run site.

A future event to note:

The next full moon run will be on Thursday 1st October and will be Stick Insect’s virgin lay for the Full Moon H3. More details next week.

Finally, Eightball’s eagerly anticipated but cancelled through unforeseen circumstances last week quiz nite will definitely be occurring on Friday 25th September at 8:30 sharp at the Office Bar. Please come along and support “Wee Dave” as Pubic Beard insists on calling him.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Night (and Afternoon) of the Living Dead


Just a little advance warning: Halloween Day happens to be a Saturday this year, and The Cronies™ are brewing up a little something special for our run. Details to follow soon, but meanwhile mark Oct. 31 on your calendars.

Oh, and along a related theme, here are your chances of dying a violent death before Halloween Day depending on where you live in the world. Simply divide by 100,000 x (365 - d), where d is the number of days remaining until Oct. 31.

Annual deaths by intentional violence, per 100,000 population (Source: World Health Organization)


Germany 0.7

Singapore 0.8

UK 1.1

Canada 1.5

Australia 1.5

Vietnam 4.2
USA 5.4

India 5.5
Laos 5.7
Malaysia 8.7
Thailand 9.4

Indonesia 9.4
Myanmar 16.7

Cambodia 17.1

Philippines 21.1

Colombia 72.4

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

It’s True!

Run #1475: Hare revealed as dangerous psychopath with erectile dysfunction as R2D2 DeTACts a towering blunder
Shock! Horror! For the second successive run, SH3 lost a runner last week as R2D2 discovered that the erection formerly known as the DTAC tower on the new Hatyai road is actually owned by TrueMoves. But this raises the serious question of why he needed to consult the literalist wing (as opposed to the approximative wing who would have understood what he meant) of the Hatyai Agrarian Liberation Front for directions when he was only 200 meters from the run site and why he couldn’t just follow the paper like the rest of us. This was undoubtedly because by that time the paper, which earlier in the afternoon had been described as small insignificant white rhomboids liberally doused with water and trodden into the mud had turned into small insignificant black rhomboids etc. The Hash’s analysist Dr Jungfraufondel comments:

“Undoubtedly die loss of paper at such eine important point in der run ist directly die responsibilitie of das hare and zat vot ve haf here is the verk of ein seriously disturbed und split personality. In fect dere ist clear evidence of der rare personality disorder, sexophrenia at verk.
Here ist eine normal run.

Notice die clear backround und der smooth outline von der run indicating that das hare ist eine normal human being.
On der udder handen, Saturday’s run shows many abnormalities.

Saturday's run

First, der background is not clear suggesting that das hare vishes to obscure his trail instead of making it clear und nicht difficult vor die hunden (who ist generally drawn from der unter intellegencia menschen) to follow. Secondly, die run does not start vere it vas supposed to. Der run site was stated to be onder der DTAC tower vereas die hare hast been unable to make der tower to start die run. Zis suggests to me that der tower ist for das hare eine penis symbol unt zat das hare ist intimidated by its erect nature unt its great length. Derefore he hast chosen instead to set die run from inside a long warm tunnel in die ondergrowth, sheathed in rubber, suggesting a secret desire to crawl back into die vomb. Tirdly, Die Trail ist also seriously bent and demonstrates a number of unusual features. Notice that dere vere two attempts to create features similar to an erect penis, suggestive of das hare suffering from some form of erectile dysfunction and using the run to compensate for his inadequacies. It is also apparent that der hare experiences fantasies of being eine damen because der hare ist making eine vagina with eine narrow neck unt eine fallopian tube. Dis strongly suggests to me zat der hare hast eine overdeveloped feminine side vich may be eine contributory factor to his inability to stiffen die meat as vie psychologists say. Finally it is obvious from der schtatistiks for dis run dat dere hast been eine nomber of attempts at massaging its length.

Artist's impression of the underlying run.

Der underlying trend ist for eine short run of around 4.4 kilomet with none of the pseudo-genital features present in die final version of das run, the length of which increased with massaging to 6.7 kilomet. Again dis vud strongly suggest to me zat der hare is attempting to compensate vor inadequacies in the penile area und was trying to fool his feminine side into thinking that it was actually longer than it really was. All in all I vuld suggest zat der hare ist ein dangerous psychopath who should only be allowed to set runs vile under restraint probably on a leach and zat he should be accompanied by at least 5 udder hares preferably all damen who should seek to reassure him zat lack of length ist nothing to be ashamed of und zat it ist not how far UP it can go zat matters but vot you do with it when you get it dere.”

The frequency with which SH3 finds itself temporarily misplacing it’s runners suggests that we may need to to amend our description to “ a drinking club for the directionally challenged with a running problem” It also once again raises the thorny question of what we should be using to set our runs, since it is notable that no one got lost the following day at HH3 when the run was set with enough shreddy to line an elephant’s litter box for a year and still not notice the wet patches. Yet the appeals in this organ for MORE SHREDDY please! Seem to fall on deaf ears. Where are you Schlumberger? Halliburton? Sperry Sun? Knackerwurst? when we need you?

Ho Hum. For the record we greeted Sven the vagabond helicopter pilot for whom Phuk seemed loath to accept responsibility, and Manijeh from Iran who is Neda’s Mum, here in Songkhla for a couple of months, and we welcomed back perenial returner Wi Wi as well as Nanking and Whoremonger who all being well, will be returning again at the end of November with a crowd of KL Full Moonies. Peppered Pussy and Yolk’s Poke had new shoes and suffered the punishment for it, It was Temporary Relief’s birthday and she, Softcock and Crackwurst subbed as hares for the cannine culprits of the run, Softdog, Illegal Beagle and Korean Barbecue who had wisely stayed at home. Solong found the irate R2D2 wandering along the new Hatyai road, finally having realized that the tower he sought belonged to TrueMoves and was not the DTAC one down by the new mosque (no doubt conveniently placed there to aid the detonation of bombs!). It was generally agreed as having been an interesting and enjoyable run and there was a marked reluctance to quit the runsite induced by Softcock having bought the beer truck which we narrowly failed to drink, there being one can remaining which was given to the beer truck driver as a present for Eid!
On! On!





Egghead

Classic Scum covers: October 2001

Old hands will recognize this early Egghead cover as a parody of Songkhla Soundings, a harmless little monthly magazine published by the late Charlie Hood. Charlie was apparently so distressed by this unexpected and vicious attack that he managed to get his testicles wedged into his car seat, requiring extraction by emergency medical personnel. Or something like . . . we forget the exact details.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Saturday 12? September
Rain, rain and more rain. Dungbeetle had claimed his pickup back. The runsite was a hundred kms past the black stump. Not promising! Paak Maa decided to stay under the car to dodge some of the falling damp. The (reputed) humans weren't so smart. Mill, mill, mill. Straight up the first hill. Gan Yao decided to go another way and disappeared. Down the other side. Mostly crap so far. Then the run started. Some fine running on fairly gentle slopes. Then, a long, long, long stretch, probably the longest bit of continuous running we've had this year. Sex Sprinter appeared yelling encouragement. Bugger that where's the beer stop? Another kilometer?...and it was! A very welcome break and on for the longest 2 clicks I can remember. No Gan Yao, have another beer. Make mine a Chang, please. Another beer.?? The hash horrors smashed up the ice. Another beer? Cars out to search. Gan Yao's mobile is in his car. Eventually a motor cycle pulled up, Gun Yao reappears.. No circle. Great run. See You next week. On-on Stick Insect

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

From the archives: Where are they now?

How times change. Here's a typical front-of-main-pack shot from about six years ago, featuring Pole Polisher, In the Post (a.k.a. The Kid with Glasses), Cheap Speed, and unidentified black and white blobs. Not only do none of them run with us regularly any more (well, maybe the blobs do), but the trail they're coming down here, at the end of the Baan Daan school road, is all but unrecognizable these days. First it was buried under construction of a fancy new paved road, which in the Thai way has now been left to fall apart. Then they dug a huge quarry, so that everything along the right edge of this shot is now a gigantic mud pit. Fortunately there's still some good running in the hills just behind . . . but for how long?

Here's an enlargement of the blobs (click for larger version). Hang on, that black one is Snapper. But any guesses who the other is?

Monday, September 14, 2009

Would you buy a used dog from these people?



Well, yes; you probably would come to think of it.
But would you trust them with a sophisticated GPS, a bag of shreddy and a passing knowledge of the big hills on the new Hatyai road and expect them to lay a decent run?
Well, come to think of it, you probably would. Which is just as well because they are the hares on Saturday, for a little number entitled:

Temporary Relief’s Birthday Run.

Details are:
SH3 run #1475, Saturday, September 19th 2009, 4:30 p.m.
Hares (in no particular order – and if you believe that one you’d believe anything!): Temporary Relief, Crackwurst and Softcock.
Misdirections: From the Ko Yo Intersection take the New Hatyai road for 8k and turn left into the runsite next to the DTAC tower.

Sunday’s HH3 run (#455 as likely as not) is a Sex Printer production and will be set from about 7k down the new Yala road on the left hand side. As usual the run won't start at 4:00 p.m. but that needn't stop you from being on time!

Finally, there’s a quiz nite this coming Friday (September 18th) at the Office Bar where your genial quizmaster will be well known cheeky chappie, Eightball. Come along and try to knock Stick Insect off his perch as Hash clever bastard. The fun kicks off at 8:00 p.m. but is then rudely interrupted by the quiz which starts at 8:30 ‘ish.
On! On!

Long Dick sightings on the increase in the South

From the pages of the



Villagers in the Nam Om region of Southern Thailand have recently reported a large number of sightings of a ghostly figure known locally as Long Dick who is said to appear around dusk and wander out of the jungle looking dazed and confused apparently searching for something. Some villagers report that he has spoken to them in a strange language and many say that he seems to be drawn irresistibly to toddy circles. Local legend has it that Long Dick is one of the hungry ghosts who discovered beer and is cursed to wander for eternity seeking unwary humans from whom he can beg a free Leo. But some people who claim to have seen the apparition report that far from looking hungry, Long Dick is actually quite plump and is referred to in Thai as ‘Pee Oan’ or the replete ghost.




















Long Dick, or Pee Oan:
An artist's impression


Opinion among locals is divided as to how to deal with Long Dick. Some advocate driving him away by waving their arms and shouting at him, while others suggest that if he is given beer he becomes quite docile and can then be lured onto the back of a motorbike and dumped near a wat or other site of religious activity.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

From the archives: Bitch on the bus

Who else but Gan Yao and the Bitch From Hell, on the bus to a hash event, probably our birthday run, October 2002.

(Incidentally, Gan Yao has recently reapplied for the rare and valuable* privilege to post here, so stand by for some exciting revelations!)

* In fact so rare and valuable that we are offering it to you! Just email us at songkhlah3@gmail.com and you too can instantly become a co-editor of The Online Scum.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Are these people trying to take over the Hash?*

This week's SH3 run is the latest instalment in Sex Sprinter and Buk Toy's dastardly attempt to make sure that they set more runs than anyone else this year. Gnash! Gnash!



Are these people Trying to take over SH3?* Are they cronies? Can Thais be cronies? Perhaps they are Thronies.






Anyway, details are:
SH3 run# 1474, Saturday September 12 2009, 4:30 p.m.
Hares: Sex Sprinter and Buk Toy
Misdirections: From the Ko Yo Intersection, take the old Hatyai Road for 4.7k and turn left. Go 11.3k to Wat Nerm Pichit. Follow the road as it bends right and go a further 1k then turn right at the (second) gas station and follow signs to the run site.

Sunday's Hatyai H3 run is being set by Scud a.k.a. Palm Job and is conveniently located at Prem's place. Run starts at 4:00 p.m.
Be there!
On! On!



*The answer to this question is of course 'No'. For anyone who is in any doubt, if it hadn't have been for Sex Sprinter and Buk Toy we would have been hard put to operate the hash this year as they have been responsible to date for more than a quarter of the runs (11 out of 37). They have selflessly given up a lot of their free time and have put enormous effort into making sure that we have good runs every time their names have appeared as hares.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Nice legs, shame about the place.

SH3 run # 1473, Saturday 5th September 2009

Tinseltown without the rain

We were in Dannock on Saturday for a joint run with Sadao H3, our daughter who makes a virtue of living on the edge. Well, some of us were anyway; there were some notable absences, but enough of us made the effort for the idea to have seemed worthwhile. For the record, the named SH3 attendees were:
Hunter, Palm Job, Stick Insect, Solong, Buk Toy, Chao Ngor, Superpig, Ram It In, Rotten Johnny, Safe Sex, Egghead, Only a Yolk, Tuttee Fruity, Yolk’s Poke, Last Lover, Peppered Pussy, Home Alone, Meals on Wheels, Screw Girl, Duck Fart, Sex Sprinter, Dark Ling, Mugabe, Knob Gobling and Twenty-Ten.
Added to these were a fair number of Malaysian runners who had managed to make it across the border, so as turnouts go this was a pretty good one.
The first problem with Dannock of course, is that it is not in Songkhla – the amazing healthy city that is, as opposed to the province, to which it clings to the very edge, just past the customs post and just before immigration. This is not a problem if you happen to live there but these days the residents seem to be mostly Burmese migrants. So for most of us, the first issue to be negotiated in running with Sadao H3 is an 80km drive.
The Egg contingent set off from Songkhla just after 2:30 p.m. choosing to by pass Hatyai via the Old Yala road. Unfortunately this seemed to be the route chosen by large numbers of other people not going to Sadao including a drunken idiot who narrowly avoided being decapitated by the rear of the Egg-mobile when it was forced to apply its brakes suddenly by the appearance ahead of a large truck on the wrong side of the road. We stopped to help him pick up his bike, but apparently intimidated by our appearance, the motorcyclist quickly picked himself and his machine up and rode off hurriedly in the opposite direction. Delayed but unbowed we resumed the journey. But it was apparent that we were going to be lucky to make the 4:00 p.m. kick off.
Shortly after that it began to rain. It rained hard, so hard that by the time we were approaching Sadao, you could barely see the road ahead. A hurried telephone conference with Stick Insect however established that the rain was also falling in Dannock and we were advised to proceed to the load up point as they would wait.
We hit traffic. It was moving, but slowly. The reason was that there was a body lying in the road and everyone wanted to get a good look. It was another motorcyclist who had met a truck; someone had thoughtfully covered it with a tarpaulin but Knob Gobling who was five minutes ahead of us sadly reported that this one had not managed to avoid decapitation. It was not living on the edge anymore; it had slipped over it. We drove on more carefully.
Shortly after we cleared the customs post and hit more traffic. A line of trucks waiting to leave Dannock which we raced past on the inside until a coach thoughtfully pulled across the road only to be blocked by a moron in a Mercedes. The minutes ticked by; it was already 4:15; we thought about turning back and looking for the A site, but then magically there we were, through the line of trucks and heading up Soi 1 for the Bagus Bar, where the rain seemed about to let up and the Sawng-Taows were already lined up waiting for us.
From that point on it all began to look up. We loaded ourselves up into the transport leaving the women and children gazing fondly after us as we retraced our steps back towards the customs post, turning off just before we hit it, along the track to the water tower where we disembarked and were instructed about the run: shreddy followed by some squares which by now might have been a bit water-logged; a fair number of checks etc. and 30 beer tokens distributed in a manner which infuriated Palm Job sufficiently for him to fall out with Knob Gobbling and Only a Yolk over the issue, who would also later almost come to blows over a beer token.
The next hour and a half or so was sheer joy. A lovely rolling run ranging around the gentle hills of Sadao. We started North, I would guess, and at some point we must have turned East. As usual, Sex Sprinter seemed to know where the paper was going to be at every check, but then suddenly he was notable by his absence, last heard screaming on! on! in the wrong direction as we headed Northwards again. Sadly for him he had found the short run, thoughtfully laid so that Tuttee Fruity would have something to do. He had other ideas and avoiding the brotherly advice of Last Lover made a dash for freedom and stayed with us for the whole of the long run. Nice one Gerry!
The shreddy ran out and we came to terms with following disintegrated squares; after a while it became second nature and some of us even managed to slip the nannying attentions of Rotten Johnny as he sensibly hung back to make sure that Tuttee Fruity stayed with us, offering some hints about the finer points of beer token placement on the way. Knob Gobbling and Only a Yolk gave us an excellent demonstration of the correct offensive lunging and grabbing technique, with OaY coming off marginally worse from the encounter, but KG gave up the token anyway. Palm Job, who was of the opinion that it was all unfair to front-runners, swooped vulture-like for another token which OaY had secreted in her knickers but was forced to hand it back as no-one comes between OaY and a beer if they know what is good for them! Then just as we were beginning to think we had run enough we met Sex Sprinter who was walking back along the trail and shortly afterwards the lake hove into view and we were running along the southern shore before a quick lope across the bridge by the Water View restaurant to the welcoming site of the beer truck.
The pack drifted back in dribs and drabs with the last drab home in about an hour forty. Most of the short runners had already been removed from the scene and we were only given a few minutes to enjoy what is probably the nicest spot any where around Dannock before being hustled into the Sawng Tauw for the return trip to The Bagus Bar. Some of us wondered whether it wouldn’t have made more sense to stay at the Water View. The amazing unhealthy city of Dannock does not look at its best in the rain. In fact arguably it does not have a best to look at. It’s just a dump. It exists on the edge of existence.

There is something edgy about the vistas of uncleared trash behind the grubby chicken shacks and the desperate looks in the eyes of the girls as they followed us up the road. There weren’t going to be too many marks around braving the weather that night and we were probably as many men in one place as they were going to see. Tinseltown in the rain; just sad.
But the Bagus Bar was full of happy people and the brats didn’t seem to have come to too much harm. Home Alone chased Peppered Pussy around the bar getting in practice for being all grown up, as the new junior Rotten was passed around and cooed over by broody harriets, managing to smile engagingly about the experience. Get used to it kid, big brother can tell you there’ll be a lot of that sort of stuff in the next few years! And when you get older and don’t have those youthful good looks anymore, you’ll still have Dannock pussy to fawn over you; as long as you’ve got the money to keep them interested.
We circled quickly as the lure of the food became too great to resist. In the absence of proper ice, two Leo cartons were filled with ice cubes and some visiting GM’s from Malaysia were made to sit in them. Palm Job was greeted from Hatyai H3 and Egghead was forced reluctantly to sub for the absent Beaver. Sinners included Knob Gobbling and Only a Yolk for squabbling over beer tokens and Sex Sprinter for run-avoidance. There were probably others… but Just Rotten (Johnny) and Chi Bai Salleh (Last Lover) were the hares and there was a pretty general agreement that the run had been excellent particularly bearing in mind that it had been set in a tropical storm.
Some people began to disappear, mostly to prepare themselves for the rest of the evening. There was some discussion about which bars were less unpleasant than others, largely based on the volume of their music and the degree of darkness. But faced with the drive back and an enforced abstinence from sufficient quantities of alcohol to make even those bars seem attractive, the Egg contingent withdrew and were mostly asleep by the time we cleared the customs post on the way out.
And that is the problem for Sadao H3. No one disagrees that the idea of running occasionally with Malaysian hashers is good and that there is some great running country around Dannock; but Dannock… well it’s just Dannock. Once you’ve been there and got over the novelty it’s not a very nice place; and that’s putting it mildly. Those notable absentees from the run on Saturday would probably be more inclined to run in Dannock if they didn’t actually have to have Dannock in their faces. Clearly there are alternative venues - the Water View for instance where people who wanted to run but didn’t want to have to dump their women and kids in Dannock could feel more comfortable.
But that’s for the future and for the Sadao H3 committee to contemplate. For now in my willing role as scribe and reluctant role as substitute Beaver, let me extend a big thank you to Sadao Hash for a great afternoon’s running and a lot of fun afterwards.
On! On!

Friday, September 4, 2009

So who's the bloke with Rotten?

Yes, despite double-hare Egghead's best efforts to put his stamp on it, it was a Rotten Weekend.

He began it Friday night with a bit of gender-bending at the Bonnie Bar, then carried on to some trail-bending so extreme that Rotten was the last one back on Saturday's run. And not for the first time. What is it about Egghead as live hare that seems to short-circuit the slime mold that passes for RJ's brain?

For the record, it was a fine live hare run, even if we lost all hope of catching up with Eggo after the first check. The countryside was fresh -- the side of the Old Yala Rd. we almost never use -- and the checks, trails etc. all of the standard we expect from the King of SH3 hares. Though personally I thought it paled next to Sunday's effort, billed as a "zombie run" (live + dead hares) and featuring a memorable downhill bit personally hand-cut through overgrown rubber by his Yolkiness.

But back to Rotten. During the run he foolishly bet me three beers that I wouldn't get in before our esteemed Hatyai leader Palm Job. So I simply stuck with RJ himself -- I knew damn well he wasn't going to let anyone get past him -- after which as stand-in English (well, sort of) speaking GM he then had the audacity to ice me for 1) competitive running and 2) short-cutting, i.e. simply by virtue of having run alongside him. To his credit he also actually managed to give out the hash name Some Cunt, most probably to one of the visiting Batu hashers.

But that was the real story of the weekend. The 12 Batu stalwarts showed up both Saturday and Sunday and brought with them the kind of total raving loony politically incorrect pisshead hash spirit that the Malaysians seem to do better than anyone. And that was just the men . . . their women were much less inhibited. Thanks Batu, and come back soon!

Misdirections 5-6 Sept.

This week’s SH3 instructions are simple: Go to Sadao!
Yes, this week there’s a joint run with Sadao Hash.
Details are sketchy but assumed to be:

Songkhla Hash House Harriers run #1473, Saturday September 5th, 4:00 for 4:30 p.m.
Hares: Rotten Johnny and …..
Misdirections: From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road and just keep going straight until you hit the Malaysian border after (about 70k) in Dannock. Then do a U turn and look for Soi 11 (which will then be on your left) Registration is at the Bagus Bar which is at the end of Soi 11 and transport from there will leave for the A site at 4:00 p.m.
Registration: We’re guessing here but, 120 Baht which will cover the run, transport to and from the A site (and any other site you might need to get to!) beer at the run site and some food after the run.
Transport to the run site: There will be no beer truck from the Parlang this week but transport to Dannock should be available if you need it. Best advice is to ring round and see who’s going down, but the egg-mobile will be departing from AUA in Platha Road next to the beach at 2:30 p.m. sharp and we can always squeeze a few more people in!

Sunday’s HH3 run will be set by Sofa and Ouab Im and will be from near Wat Tungnai: From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for 4.7k and turn left. Follow the road for 8k to Wat Keow Kloy then turn right into Th. Poonakan . Follow it for about 5k. and look for the Hash sign.