Wednesday, October 30, 2013

A GM's excuse me

With our usual team of workhorse-hares otherwise engaged, this Saturday, the SH3 run will be a relay hare run from the same runsite that HH3 used last weekend, with the subtle difference that the GM will lead us off, hopefully in a direction completely different from that in which he got lost last Sunday!
Details are:
SH3 run #1690, Saturday November 2nd, 4:00 p.m. (PLEASE NOTE THE CHANGE OF TIME)
Misdirections: From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for 4.7k and turn left for 9.5k to the runsite on the right.
There are strong rumours of a quiz night this Friday at the Office Bar at which, in a sop to globalization, French Eric will deliver a quiz written by Carsten the Viking. The Hash team will therefore feature an international cast including a New Zealand dope farmer and a Brit Pedant who are open to offers to fill the two vacant seats left by our regular losers members (Dutch religious loonies need not apply but anyone from Northern Ireland or answering to the name of Apeshit would receive serious consideration). This is probably a good week to challenge the recent supremacy of the "Teachers" since Eightball will be in the UK and that sniveling traitor Short Screw has departed for Chiang Mai. The ask-off is set for 8:00 p.m.; don't be late!

Sunday's HH3 run is as below: From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for 4.7k and turn left for 8k then right (at Wat Keow Kloy into Poonakan Rd.) for about 5.5k then left and follow the road for about 500 meters to the run site. The hares seem to be Robocop and Sex Racing.

Sunday, October 27, 2013

Your birthday pussy

Contrary to what is stated on your new hash T-shirt, it took 6 pussies and a technical adviser to set these two relatively mild pussy runs, the long run purring in at 6.3k and hitting 104 meters for whoever found the check back at the 5th 360, and the short run squeaking in at 3.1k/60 meters. The weather conditions could best be described as damp, although the run itself and the circle avoided the rain which preceded it and apparently accompanied most of the party, although by that time the main liquid influence was being felt internally!

The party was generally felt to have been among the best we have enjoyed, with our guests from Ko Samui and Hatyai prominent as we romped through 2 rounds of musical chairs, killer karaoke,and a game involving lemons the main point of which seemed to be to guess the rules as you went along. Tsunami and Nnnnggggg! won that one mainly because it involved forms of intimate bodily contact at which they are obviously well practised.

Stumps were drawn at about 10 when the KSH3 contingent hit the beer truck home. At that point a count was conducted and it was found that there were only 7 cans of Chang left in the eskie, suggesting either that we had come perilously close to a beer crisis or that the catering department had got it just about perfect. Big thanks are due to the pussies, Only a Yolk, Temporary Relief and Ork Dork,who organised just about everything and to Crackwurst, Meals on Wheels and Peppered Pussy who helped them set the runs. Also up for a gong are the owner and staff of the Tung Jaeng restaurant who seem to enjoy our parties almost as much as we do, and who laid on a constant supply of great food which was still being replenished when we were all ready to head for home. Thanks also to Bung, our faithful Beer Truck Driver (mark III) who organised the logistics for our guests, to Sex Printer for the T shirts and to Stick Insect for providing the financial muscle.

To those who missed it, don't do it again! To those who didn't, thanks for making it a great party and see you all again for 33 in 2014.

Friday, October 25, 2013

4:00 p.m. Sunday. 'Nuff said.

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Our guests this weekend

This fine upstanding bunch of pissheads group of people will be arriving in Songkhla tomorrow in desperate need of refreshment  (Jeez, they have to drink Heineken on Ko Samui?) and relaxation. The plan is to meet up in the Buzz Stop tomorrow evening (Friday 25th October) at 6:30 p.m. to help them recover from their arduous journey and to prepare them for Saturday's pussy run (which may be best faced with a hangover).
Please come along to support this act of kindness.

Now where was that Runsite again?

A bit late, but better late than never, this is the track for last weekend's Saturday run. I can understand the runners being confused after the beer stop, but the route TO the beer stop was pretty straight-forward, wasn't it?

Run stats were:  long run 8.2kms long including all false trails, total up was 255m with the longest (highest?) hill being only 60m high;  short run 3.6kms long, total up 98m. The long runners were all back in together in about 1hr 20mins. The short run followed the long run track up until the Beer stop, where the short runners were abducted by the effervescent R2D2 and guided up the gravel road back to the runsite. The long runner's were probably wishing they had found enlightenment in the bottom of their beer cans.

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

32 years of....

...bull... you'll find out on Saturday when SH3 celebrates its 32nd birthday with a run and a party at the Thung Jaeng Restaurant in the new Yala road at which we will entertain our two closest friends geographically in Thailand, Hatyai H3 and Koh Samui H3.
Details are:
Songkhla Hash House Harriers, run #1689, Saturday, October 26th 2013, 4:30 p.m.
Hares: Only a Yolk, Peppered Pussy, Temporary Relief and Ork Dork
Misdirections: From the Kao Saeng intersection take the old Yala road for 11k and turn right into the new Yala road then take the new left hand carriageway for about 1.5k to the run site on the left. (N.B. the unofficial U turn just before Tung Jaeng has now been closed  so you need to get onto the left hand side of the new central reservation as soon as you can after the Ang Thong intersection. If you are intending to come from the Ko Yo intersection up the new Yala road then to avoid having to go almost to the end of the NYR, you need to cross right onto the new carriageway after about 8k, at the top of the hill, then drive down about 1k on the wrong side of the road to Thung Jaeng which will then be on your right - don't worry, as of today the new carriageway was not officially open for business, but if it is, just turn your headlights on full beam and pretend you didn't notice!)
Run Fee: 200 Baht for SH3 and HH3 (kids 100 Baht). Guests: 600 Baht to include the run, beer etc. dinner and party, a T shirt you will be proud to wear in the politest of company, and for the guests it will also include registration at HH3 on Sunday...
...which is as yet undeclared, as in no one stepped up to set it last weekend - so shocked were they at the cruel and unusual treatment they had just received in Hatyai Park! But no doubt news will be forthcoming before Saturday and it will be passed on when it is.

Monday, October 21, 2013

Full Moon ramblings

Here, only slightly out if sequence, is last week's Full Moon H3 run which was laid amid a rumbling multi-faceted and entirely avoidable (just do what you're told Albert - you know it makes sense!) dispute between Moo Saab and Leum Kee which resulted in the paper being rather sporadic. Towards the end of the run that proved to be too much for the directionally challenged who within sniffing distance of the beer truck, went off in search of shreddy and spent 10 minutes or so trying to get their bearings before being brought home by some inspired hand-light waving and shouting. A shame, because the run was otherwise highly enjoyable, as was the apres run session which went on until at least 11 o'clock. Length was about 5.7k without the F's, and the maximum height was 72 meters with a total ascent of about 100 meters.
Present throughout, although not actually partaking of the run, were Sunday's HH3 hares, Sex Star and Sexy Girl, who were clearly very upset by the reports of a flat trail in open country for the most part of which the pack were able to run. The result of their misgivings about this dangerous trend in southern Thai hashing, where people are actually allowed to enjoy their runs, was a miserable 80 minutes above Hatyai Park yesterday, when any suggestion of a trail was promptly strangled and the pack were repeatedly sent off into impenetrable shiggy often on slopes steep enough to justify the use of hills as a means of stretching runs, before being dumped onto the road and left to run the last kilometer or so on tarmac. The net result was that the  those who had been lucky enough to do Saturday's SH3 run (illustration awaited) found that its quality had increased to stellar levels by 5:30 yesterday evening!
So it's on-on to this week's birthday run, of which more shortly.

Friday, October 18, 2013

Peter Fitzgordon and Gordon Fitzpeter

This moment of tender male bonding between this week's hares (notice the matching T shirts...) surfaced in the weekly trawl through Google Images in search of pictorial inspiration, which became sufficiently extended to ensure that the misdirections did not appear promptly enough to prevent fly-posting. Not sure who took it - probably Beaver, it has all the hallmarks of the paparazzi - that innocent moment of youthful exuberance turned into blackmail fodder.
So, all that needs to be said is that this will be SH3 run #1688 and that it will take place at 4:30 p.m. on Saturday, 19th October 2013. The hares will be Yardstick and R2D2 and  the misdirections are in the post below.

Nothing complicated about Sunday's HH3 run - go to Hatyai Park and look for a sign, well, to be more precise go about 14k down the Old Hatyai Road and turn left into gate 2 then follow whatever indications there are to the car park behind the lake. The run starts at 4:00 p.m.

Non-Offical Misdirections to SH3 Run #1688

The GM may still be too busy calculating the cumulative effects of hills on the runs, so following are the instructions to get to Saturday's SH3 run #1688, which is guaranteed not to have any overly taxing hills, as per the last few HH3 & SH3 runs.

If coming from the Songkhla area, go 4.6kms past the Ko Yor intersection on the Old Hatyai Road and turn left (at a red HH3 sign). Proceed 10.7kms from OHR (2.9kms past Wat Khao Kloi) and turn left at the new yellow SH3 sign. Proceed 2.9kms in a more or less straight-on direction, going about 500m beyond the end of the bitumen to the runsite.

For Hat Yai vehicles either Poonakan Rd or the Nam Noi Rd to Tha Kham and on to Wat Khao Kloi would be the better option. Then 2.9kms past Wat Khao Kloi towards Wat Pichit and turn left, then another 2.9kms to the runsite.

Four wheel drives and over ambitious pickups should park in the rubber on the left past the clearing. Toy cars and other low slung vehicles can park along the side of the road.

I'm sure the abbreviated instructions will be posted shortly by the official Miss-Directional editor accompanied by appropriate illustrations.

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Mathematics defended

The distribution of length added to a run by height is a power distribution given by the formula:
T1=(T-y)+(y2+x2Where T1 is the enhanced length, T is the flat distance, y is the flat distance below sections of the run going up or down, and x is the total ascent/descent.
The distribution below shows the effect based on T=6km and x=600 (i.e a total measured ascent of 300m) which are typical figures for our runs.
The effect is less than 100 meters until the flat distance under the up/down sections falls below 1700 meters. At that point the average gradient would be greater than 35%, which means that allowing for some gentle slopes near the base of hills, the steeper bits would be steep enough to fall off!
Bart's right, if we want to add distance to our runs we'd be better off chasing each other round the beer truck for 20 seconds than adding hills!

Full moon 103

Tomorrow night (Wednesday ) is Full Moon Hash night. Details are:
Hatyai Full Moon Hash House Harriers run #103. Wednesday 16th October 7:00 p.m.
Hares: Leum Kii and Moo Sahb (but not necessarily in that order!)
Misdirections: From the Ko Yo Intersection take the old Hatyai Road for 4k and turn left for 6k then left for about 500 meters (about 200 meters beyond the water tower) to the run site.
The hares expect to be setting an A-B run so BE THERE ON TIME (or call someone if you think you will be late, as the transport to the A site will be ready at 7:00 p.m.
Otherwise the usual stuff applies: bring a hand-light if you intend to run and some food if you feel like it. Beer is optional but the price of full moon special brew will now be 120 Baht for 3 cans in view of the recent hike in beer prices, which you can avoid by bringing your own!
There will also be a further attempt on Wednesday night to reach a consensus about joining the Malaysian Full Moon Interhowl at Dannock next month. The venture seems to be teetering towards viability with 8 people committed, one more 90% and 3 saying they will come if there is a reasonable turnout from SH3/HH3/HFMH3.

Sunday, October 13, 2013

1687: What Pythagoras made of it

Here it is in all its 4.6k glory... well, ok that's flat distance as can be seen from the above profile, but courtesy of Pythgoras we can calculate the actual distance taking into account the overall up (and down) of 290 meters as: √((2x290)2 +46002)=4636.42 meters. Wow! All that climbing and only another 36 meters - that's maths for you.
But if the run was forgettable, and most people seemed to want to forget it as quickly as possible, 1687 was notable for incorporating a genuine on-on, with a dozen or so people repairing to Thung Jaeng for a few more beers and some food immediately after the termination of the usual unruly circle which dragged on with interminable announcements about forthcoming attractions, including a double header, SH3/HFMH3 next week (maybe) the birthday run in 2 weeks time and the possibility of trips to Dannock and Ubon Ratchathani in the next few months.
More of the same today at Hatyai, where commitments to joining the Full Moon Interhowl on 30th November will be sought, so if you are up for a return to Sadao, be there today! 

Friday, October 11, 2013

Too short! Oh, it's the short run.

Sadly, last week's R2D2/Perky/Keeling long run did not for some inexplicable reason make it into posterity, which is a shame as it was generally agreed to be excellent. But that's technology for you. Anyway as some compensation here is the short run which clocked up a creditable 3.8k and went up to 137m and took about the same time as the long run (1hr 10ish).

So more of the same this week with Perky making a second successive appearance as a hare.
Details are:

Songkhla Hash House Harriers run #1687, Saturday October 12th 2013: 4:30 p.m.
Hares: Egghead and Perky
Midirections: From the Ko Yo intersection take the new Yala road for 7k and turn right into the run site. (If it's wet we will use the upper site, but if it's dry you can drive down to the lower site as long as you are confident you will be able to drive back up after the run. If not park at the top and walk down!)
Sunday's (13th October) HH3 runsite has been changed (can't remember where it was intended to be!) and is now at the big sala behind the CP factory (from the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for 6.5k and turn right for about 1k). Don't forget, the start has been brought forward to 4:00 p.m. where we all thought it was anyway!

Thursday, October 3, 2013

Two runs and a book appeal

Saturday's SH3 run details are:
Songkhla Hash House Harriers run #1686, Saturday October 5, 2013, 4:30 p.m.
Hares: R2D2, Perky and Kee Ling
Misdirections: from the Kao Saeng intersection take the old Yala road for 8k and turn right for as far as you need to go to get to the run site (probably about 2.5k).
Sunday's map below.  From Songkhla, if you want the easy but long route,  from the Ko Yo Intersection go about 22k along the old Hatyai road, past Macro as far as the big intersection and turn left towards Chana. Go about 1.5k and do a U turn. The run site is then on the left. Don't forget that the starting time has been changed to 4:00 p.m.

Finally, a book appeal: Could everyone check on their bookshelves for copies of The Remains of the Day by Kasuo Ishiguro and The Master and Margerita by Mikhail Bulgakov which have been lent out but not returned. In-U-Endo would like to read them! Thanks.