It felt like a monster to me

The secret side of me, I never let you see
I keep it caged but I can't control it
So stay away from me, the beast is ugly
I feel the rage and I just can't hold it

It's scratching on the walls, in the closet, in the halls
It comes awake and I can't control it
Hiding under the bed, in my body, in my head
Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it end?

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin
I must confess that I feel like a monster
I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun
I must confess that I feel like a monster

I, I feel like a monster
I, I feel like a monster

Hawkfrost

So what is this, monster envy? OK so it wasn't cosmically huge, but it felt like a monster. There was that edgy feeling like standing on a high board and not quite knowing whether to jump or just quietly turn round and climb back down to the pool, particularly as we all flailed about in the shiggy at the first check. But once it got under way it could easily have gone on until it got dark - and in fact for Softy and Bravefart it did go on until dark as the pack's increasingly annoying inability to break checks and the disappearing puce paper took its toll on the back runners. And it was a surprise when it finished so quickly. No one seemed to expect the runsite to suddenly loom up out of nowhere but there weren't too many complaints that it did.

I, I feel like a monster! Yeah!