Short, short, shorter

Total length including false trails: 8.6km (not that anyone is likely to have done it). Total ascent: 327m. First back in 1:06, last by 1:12. No need even to mark the short run here since the long runners didn't break the checks and so the short runners had to short cut their run too. Click to see it big.

So I tried two things today I thought the HH3 boys would like: an easily short-cuttable route around the bottom of that gawdawful hill that we usually go straight up, and a nice generous 700km dirt road finish for some Hollywood sprinting. In fact nobody sprinted or cared about the run-in, but they certainly seemed to enjoy the short-cutting possibilities. Robocop was especially lavish in his praise, probably because he came in first (despite having run a half-marathon in the morning), not that we keep track or anything. OK, so next time I'll try to do one where going off paper will be rewarded with a fall off a cliff face or a plunge into a swamp.

The mystery logo

1953

Despite spending way too much time on it this morning, I've had no luck in tracking down the strange logo on last night's quiz that we were told belongs to Singapore Airlines. That airline in fact has had only one logo since its formation in 1972, though here you can also see the corporate symbols of its two predecessors.

1966

But not to quibble. Big Alex set a pretty good quiz and the hash team, after a few recent humiliations at the hands of the teachers, roared back with a vengeance. Victory felt especially sweet as one of our key members - he shall remain nameless here - had decided to desert our three-man team and join another. And not just any other, but the remains of our nemesis, the dreaded teachers.

1972

We were especially gratified to see the formation of the first women's team we can recall at Quiz Night. While they didn't win they did have the best team name of the night: "Show Us the Front Side of Your Bum".

Meanwhile, modest in victory as he is graceful in defeat, honorary hash team captain Egghead simply commented, "Nyaa-nyaa-nyaa-nyaa! Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!"  

1111 Stick Insects

Another milestone will be reached in the career of our illustrious leading active runner on Saturday when he reaches his one thousand and eleventy first run. To celebrate, there will be a special Stick Insect run, and dinner to follow at Tung Jaeng. Named SH3 runners at the runsite will also be eligible to receive a souvenir of this glittering occasion, which will be available in green, brown or shades of grey and will need to be fed on juicy leaves from the Bong-Bong tree. Contributions of food beyond snacks that can be consumed with fingers are probably not necessary, but donations of beer are always welcome, although if possible these should be purchased at Tung Jaeng to support the good people who so generously host these events, particularly if we are minded to ask them to look after our birthday run again in a couple of months' time.
Details are:
Songkhla Hash House Harriers run #1733, Saturday August 30th, 4:30 p.m.
Hare: Stick Insect
Misdirections: From the Ko Yo intersection take the new Yala road for about 7.2k and look for a sign directing you to park on the unused section of the right-hand carriageway of the road just after the top of the hill. (Dog-owners note that the run will involve crossing the road at the beginning and end of the run although this can be avoided by parking in the old wood yard on the left hand side of the road which can be accessed directly from the new Yala road with great care.)

Sunday's (31st August) HH3 run is a bye-bye Beaver affair, as the amiable rodent is off on his travels again next week. Misdirections from Songkhla are: From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for 4.6k and turn left for 8k then right for 7.5k (at Wat Khao Kloi down Th. Punnakan). Turn left into Th. Baan Nai Rai and go 1.3k then look for the runsite on the left under the power lines. Hare: Sex Focus.

Finally, there is a quiz night this Friday (29th August) at the Office Bar at 8:00 p.m. when the Hash team will attempt to salvage its pride after last months annihilation at the hands of the evil bald people formerly know as the teachers. The quiz master is Big Alex who sets a mean quiz, and everyone is welcome, particularly if they are female as it would be really, really, really nice to dissipate the air of male domination which tends to pervade these events!

Transgenic mutants and birthday girls

People definitely came to party this weekend. Good runs on both Saturday and Sunday but even better circles and on-afters. Beer consumption: massive.

The entity formerly known as Khai Jiao has been taken over by the pod people.

Muu Sap denounces . . . what could it have been? Oh yes, Khai Jiao!

Sinners!

Birthday girls before new shirts and cake.

. . . and after.

Some of the more hardcore revelers, about 9 pm.

HH3 today

Total ascent: can't be bothered (but it wasn't much), maximum height unknown (don't care; there was no hill unless your name was Sex Printer or Ape Shit. Long run: 7.5k, first runner home in 56 minutes. Short run: 5k, first runner home in 50 minutes.
Mission accomplished (and we drank all the beer!)

Knee-tremblingly good

Lots of hill, lots of running, lots of trails, 1732 had it all. Maximum height 280m, total ascent 330m and 7.5k without the extras but  not including the road-route home which Beaver and Short Screw added to the mix.  First runner allegedly home in 1 hour 6 minutes. Really? R2D2 reported that the 3.5k short run took 1 hour 15, so there may be something wrong there!
The après run was conducted from a seated position as the strain told. The circle commenced with the GM ritually dousing himself in iced water and voluntary icings were allowed in honor of George W Bush... or was it Bill Gates. The beer truck was eventually drunk dry and the remnants of the pack finally called it a day at about 8:00 p.m. Shouldn't all Saturdays be like this? Oh! They are!
More to come today as the Egg family prepare to wow HH3. Be there!

Pussy 'n' eggs

Okay, okay, I know the title sounds like something between your deepest darkest fantasy and one of those nicey nicey books that kids are supposed to enjoy having read to them. But it is in fact the combination which will be presenting your runs this coming weekend, as Only a Yolk has now volunteered on behalf of the Pussies and the Egg family to set both the SH3 and HH3 runs.

Details of the SH3 pussy run are:
Songkhla Hash House Harriers run #1732, Saturday August 23rd 2014, 4:30 p.m.
Hares: including but not limited to Only a Yolk, Handjob and Temporary Relief
Misdirections: From the Ko Yo intersection take the new Yala road for 3.5k to the run site on the left.

Sunday's HH3 run is also handily placed for Songkhlites. Misdirections from Songkhla are: from the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for 4k and turn left for about 6k then turn right onto the new concrete road and follow signs and paper for about 500m to the runsite. For Hatyai sourced hounds, take the old road and turn right at the Kuan Hin traffic lights for 6k etc. The hares are likely to be Moo Sahb and Kai Jeow.

Helpful graphic below for the literally minded.

A stroll around Khao Long

Yellow x's indicate where fun-loving locals picked up the paper, and green x's where they relaid it. The blue line is the short-run in-trail.

As probably everyone figured out pretty quickly, #1731 was just a circuit around Khao Long. This made for a fairly ambitious short run: about 5.5km long with 250m total ascent. It took the short runners over an hour and a half, and a few of them were less than impressed. Notably, Crackwurst tried to attack the hare with her walking stick. Fortunately she was too exhausted to catch me. Handjob just gave me a lot of dirty looks, though a couple bowls of som tam quickly restored her good humor.

The long run added one extra loop, for 7km total distance and 350m ascent, including false trails. All the long runners came in within one minute of 1:15. I wish I could take credit for keeping everyone so closely together but that was more thanks to some helpful locals who picked up a couple hundred meters of paper and cleverly relaid it in the other direction. The above track shows that the hare never went near where the paper was found, north of the trail. This disproves Acting GM Stick Insect's claim that the hare forgot where he went. Not that I couldn't or wouldn't do that, but I had Mr. Garmin with me and he knows exactly where he is.

One naming -- Christina is now Throbbin' Hood -- and two new runners. Sex Sprinter was iced for wearing a non-hash t-shirt that featured a photo of his own face. Let's hope this is a fashion fad that doesn't catch on.

Whatever you thought of the run, if you go out on Robocop's Nam Noi likely vertical death march today, I predict that you will soon be looking back wistfully on the gentle slopes and friendly trails of Khao Long. On-on!  

Run 1731: So good we're gonna do it twice!

Remember run 1731? Of course you do! It was only a couple of weeks ago at Egg Towers and was followed by one of the Hash's rare (as in they only happen about twice a week) parties.
Apparently not! That it turns out was run 1729, which just goes to show that the effects of Dyslexia extend not only to directional disfunction but also to an inability to cope with large numbers!
So this week really really is:
Songkhla Hash Harriers' run #1731, Saturday, August 16th 2014: 4:30 p.m.
Hare: Beavershot
Misdirections: From the Kao Seng intersection take the old Yala road for 11.8k (about 1k past the junction with the new Yala road, but before the market at Tung Wang) and turn right. Follow the road for 2k to a crossroad and go straight across. Follow the road for a further 1.8k and turn right (on the road leading up to Kao Ron) and go about 1k to the run site on the right, helpfully depicted above.
If you are coming from Hatyai, get to the Tha Kham crossroads (7k from the Nam Noi traffic lights or 2k North of Wat Keow Kloy at the end of Poonakan) and head East towards and past the Sai Kaow Resort for about 5.2k, then turn left into the road leading to Kao Ron (big sala and statue of a  monk on the corner). At the Y junction after 500 meters bear left and follow the road for about 1k to the run site on the right.
Sunday's HH3 run will be set by Robocop and sexy friends from the really big sala behind the CP factory (old Hatyai road, 6.5k, turn right for about 1k, runsite on the right: map below for the imaginative). Bring crampons and rope - we're likely to be going up in the world!

Small numbers, good runs

Turnout was a bit small this holiday weekend, especially on Saturday, but hare Sex Sprinter supplied us with not one but two excellent runs. Well, three really, as thanks to Stick Insect's instructions, a hardy band of four of us managed to do both the medium and long runs on Saturday. Sunday's run featured a long ridge run in an area I always thought was impassable, and it probably would have been any time but right now, with things about as dry as they ever get here.

I can't promise anything as creative next week but there will be paper to run and beer to drink, and what more can you expect for 60 baht? On-on to Khao Long! (Misdirections to follow.)

A change of plan

With so many people away this weekend, plans for a joint SH3-Full Moon H3 run on Saturday have been dropped and the run has undergone a significant shift Eastwards, and is now:
Songkhla Hash House Harriers run #1732, Saturday August 9th 2014, 4:30 p.m.
Hare: Sex Sprinter: live!
Misdirections: From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for 4.7k and turn left for 6k then turn left at the Ban Tha Kham crossroads for about 4k to the runsite on the right just before Sai Kao Resort.

HH3 map for Sunday (10th August) below with directions from Songkhla appended. Same hare, different gravy!

From the Ko Yo intersection take the old Hatyai road for about 10k to the Nam Noi traffic lights and turn left for about 3k then turn right for around 3/4k and look for the sign on the right. Follow the road to the runsite.

1731: Flat in places, wet later.

With a total ascent of just 60m and a maximum height of 52m, Saturday's SH3 run ought not to have troubled the acrophobic, nor was the long run's 7k particularly challenging. But some rough going early on was not appreciated by the purists and a certain uneveness after the beer stop was also commented on, even if virtually everything in between was run on tracks. The short run at 4.4k was carefully calculated to have everybody  arriving together at the beer stop located just before the final F, in which it was almost successful, with only Buk Toy just failing to make it, and Gan Yao and Kee Ling opting to miss out the second half of the run completely. Thanks to Palm Job and Rua Man Kap for contributions of beer, to Beavershot for the wine box and to all those who contributed food to what seemed like a good party which followed.

Grow your own

Thanks to Gashole/Gaseous and wife (both pointing), HH3 has officially gone hydroponic. That's hare Robocop lurking behind the tree on the right.

Another mind-bending and ball-breaking Hatyai run from Robocop yesterday. The problem is that he of course is a cyborg and doesn't seem to realize that nobody else is. I can't report much personally as I got radically off course, ending up barreling down through shiggy to suddenly find myself tottering on the top edge of that massive quarry. Almost landing on a large black snake across the trail on Saturday provided a nice shot of adrenaline, but this was more like seeing your life flash before your eyes. Even the short runners reported a killer run. But don't blame the hare -- we're the ones who keep coming back for more. On-on!

Where do you fit in?

At last, the main modern personality types perfectly explained . . . .